compassionate.

It's just one of those times. not just any time, those times. Where the saying "when it rains it pours" doesn't fit, it's more like "when it rains it hurricanes". I realize according to my last blog my biggest worries were that Jim and Pam would stay together and getting my finger out of my tic tac dispenser but it's actually been hard to find something amusing to write about. It's that feeling of just dangling out there. It started with a relationship lost that I actually don't know what happened. Then it's family that's being tested for cancer, again. Then someone having a mastectomy today. Then losing a compassionate woman of God Sunday night. it's in these times when some people (myself included) would ask the questions we've all heard or asked ourselves, "why do bad things happen to good people?", or "why did God let this happen?". As to the first my response is simple: crap happens (there's a devine word for ya). It happens to both the so called good and the so called bad people. As to the second, there is probably never an answer in the moment. I myself believe that everything happens in Gods time whether it seems right to you or not. Not to say everything is going to seem awesome because I find the majority of the time it doesn't feel right at all. So what's life all about if bad things are going to happen to everyone and no one has any clue why God lets it? Well the woman who passed away seems to be what I come back to. She has stuggled with severe asthma and numerous other health problems for a very long time. She knew her time was short but it didn't stop her in any way from caring about people and their relationship to Christ. She affected so many people (in the positive) and truly led such a full life. Compassionate seems to be the word to say it all. It made me realize (this so simple truth) that it was never promised to be easy and the ultimate: that the only perfection to ever come to earth died for us. Us. The ones that ask those questions and God lets us. He lets us be mad at Him. He lets us question 'why?' when it doesn't seem like there is any fairness. I think we have to live each day in the moment but with the bigger picture in mind. Like Ms Imilsie, or Ms Cookie (another amazing Godly woman). To affect change.
There is so much more that I want to say, and this is probably a jumble of thoughts but I just wanted to put it out there. This was hard for me to write because normally I don't want to write about stuff this serious on just a blog, but I felt like I should. Who knows - this could affect change. In closing words I think the Fray wraps it up with the lyric (the most quoted on myspace) but seriously, "Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same".